If you need to move something big (like a company, brand, bureaucracy or collective theory), take the mafia approach: chop it up limb for limb so that you can fit the parts in your trunk and move on. As with any complicated problem, you need to break it down into several constituent parts, analyze them and reconfigure them into a package that’s easier to manage. Many smaller problems tangle into larger complex problems if left unchecked. To completely clean up the mess, you need to resolve them all. It takes an analytical mind to separate everything and navigate the labyrinth. Not easy to do. And it takes a lot of time. Sometimes it’s not worth it. Certainly not worth it to butcher a corpse. Some ships need to sink. More often than not, you need to try. Do what you can to break it all down, focus on the details and figure things out.
Category Archives: Life
Profiteering Is Not A Good Bet
Setting out to build a business or project for the money is a huge risk – a bigger risk than building something meaningful that can make the world a better place. What happens if you seek a capital return and come up dry? What do you have then? Sadly, you have nothing but a lot of wasted time and energy. What if you build something that makes a difference, but still does not pay out? At least then you can be proud of building something great. Never do things for the money – you have everything to lose. Do things for the challenge, the value to the world, and for yourself. Build something you can be proud of, something rewarding in and of itself.
Listen to Your Body
I spent the better part of my high school and college years fighting my body and pretending to be immortal. For that, I was rewarded with threats to my heart and notable memory retention deprivation. We’ve only got one body (as far as I know), so what’s the point? It’s like using a million-dollar prize for firewood and burning most of it up in one fell swoop. Damn shame. Why not listen to your body and take care of it? If you’re tired, sleep. If you’re hungover, don’t drink more. If you’re hungry, eat. If you’re sick, rest. Simple logic far too often ignored. Very shortsighted to ignore these signals in favor of making a good impression at the office, meeting a deadline or proving a point. Especially dumb to put your body to the test as some public point of pride. Why I bragged about how little sleep I got in high school is beyond me. Don’t do it. It’s dumb. Take care of yourself!
The Collateral Damage of Making A Difference
The people who make a difference in this world aim to break rules. At whatever cost, they have something to prove. Sometimes true disruption means breaking hearts and losing friends. It’s a tough game to play and takes a thick skin. That said, you cannot change the world alone. It’s imperative to treat people well – be polite, caring and respectful. Never set out to hurt people. Make as many friends as you can. Earn as much respect as you can. Love everyone. Do not intend to break people. But you should intend to break systems. And people get attached to systems. So be prepared for collateral casualties.
The single worst thing you could do? Nothing. If you’re afraid to change the world because it means some people may not like you, you fail to understand what “changing the world” really means. I meet a lot of people who claim they want to make a difference. Very few of them have the balls to lose friends in the process. Do you?
Side By Side
As much as it pains me to quote a Quentin Tarantino film on my blog, awkward silences always make me think of Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction: “Why do we feel it’s necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?” You don’t need to flap your gums all the time. There are other ways to communicate and experience relationships. Sometimes it’s just nice to sit there with someone. Enjoy the company. Feel the breeze. Live life – and remember you’re living it together. I will never bash good conversation. But some of the best moments in life go unspoken.
The Best Kind of Roommate
…is one you can talk to. I find little more therapeutic than coming home to a good conversation. Party friends, work friends and game buddies often make lousy roommates. Find someone with whom you can vent or philosophize. Same applies to the person you marry. Sex only lasts so long – make sure you’re with someone you’ll still be relieved to see and talk to everyday when you’re old and broken.
Excuses Are Better Than Nothing
Things don’t always work out. We all get it. No big deal. But if you’re going to flake, at least give the courtesy of an explanation. Most of the time, good excuses can cure ill will. A strong explanation may be the only thing that can win you a second chance. Even dishonest excuses are better than nothing. Any effort to empathize with the inconvenience or disappointment you impose is better than no effort at all.
If you flake all the time, excuses run their course. Nothing can help you then.
10 Reasons Why My Mom Is Better Than Your Mom
- You can talk to her about anything (except maybe computer semantics).
- She cares less about jewelry, makeup or fancy houses and more about good art, people, travel and food.
- She never says no, but she will give you a good example of why it might be a bad idea.
- She is straightforward and honest (no passive aggressive crap).
- She can have loads of fun without turning into a sloppy, embarrassing mess (thank you, Mom, for your alcohol tolerance).
- She works her ass off and still finds time to feed her family.
- She is creative, handy and inventive (I’ve never met a woman who can reuse wine corks like she can).
- She puts up with and endorses nerdiness like few other women can.
- She stops at nothing to serve her friends, students, coworkers and family.
- She never gives up without a fight and always forgives you.
I love you, Mom. Happy Mother’s Day.
Old Acquaintances and Second Chances
People change. Sometimes enough that they mature into completely different people. Strange to be back in my hometown – I’ve noticed that many old friends have an aversion to other people they knew in high school and have not seen since. Why shy away from folks you used to know? Perhaps you both have changed into a more compatible pair. I’ve seen many partnerships form between people who did not respect each other when they were younger. Some started businesses together. Others got married. You never know who you might bump into or connect with on a fresh level. At the very least, it’s worth the introduction. Avoid trading numbers if the reintroduction fails. But do not close your mind on outdated memories and awkward nostalgia. Ignore the past and give second chances where possible. You might build some great new relationships out of the deal.
Exercising A Healthy Attitude
Charles Swindoll said, “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.” It’s all about attitude and what you take personally. If you don’t let things bother you, life rolls on pretty pain-free. I do not promote ignorance, however, so people with an inherent “whatever” attitude disappoint me with how disconnected they are from the people and issues around them. You need to care – often care a lot – to make a difference in this world. It takes the balance of a monk and the stamina of an olympian to put your heart everywhere and nowhere at the same time. It’s exhausting and you need to make sure you stay in good shape to keep the balance alive. My brother said it well: “If you don’t have the energy to be positive, it’s impossible to be positive – your health is your first priority.” Your reaction to life depends solely on your frame of mind. If you are mentally or physically beat to hell, it’s pretty difficult to muster a positive reaction to anything. Make a point to sleep well, eat well and take real breaks. Take care of yourself. With a healthy mind, you can meet life with a healthy attitude and virtuous reactions. Otherwise, you will foster an exponential geyser of negativity that will only drag you down and keep making life worse.
Craig Ormiston 