It’s the single healthiest thing you can do for your organization, relationships, partnerships, parenting or marriage. I’m convinced that’s why my parents have lasted 30 years together. Sitting down is the first and essential step toward strong communication. Make time for it. I’m not kidding.
Category Archives: Life
Make Boring Chores Fun Routines
Like most human beings, I hate flossing. Spending three extra minutes or more per day to rip thread through your gums feels so lame. To help me floss routinely, I’ve started listening to music while I do it in an effort to listen to my entire music library. Fortunately, most boring chores are boring because they are not mentally stimulating and can therefore be supplemented through multi-tasking. Combine one low cognitive activity you enjoy less with a less-involved mental activity you enjoy more. Accept that you need to do boring chores. Find a way to do them faster, better and with an added bit of fun. Gamify them, keep statistics, accomplish other goals while you’re at it – whatever it takes. If you do it right, these otherwise boring moments in your day could serve very strategic and meaningful purposes.
Time OR Stress, Not Both
In college, sleep deprivation and stress pushed my heart to the edge and sent me to the doctor one too many times. I’ve made very long strides to take better care of myself since then. Lately, I’ve been sleeping an average 7.8 hours per night if you’d believe it. I’ve always tried to be a badass and keep things cool in spite of the pain. Looking back, the number of times I boasted to peers about all-nighters makes me sick. Anymore, I keep it as cool as possible for my health: playing things down and taking situations less seriously has the magical effect of helping you actually take situations less seriously.
Over the years, I’ve learned one thing about personal investment in your job, projects or activities overall: you can give it all of your time or give it all of your stress, but not both. The cumulative tax on your body and mental health is not sustainable. If you find yourself stressing out about your work, give it time away. If you find yourself completely entrenched in working hours, find whatever way possible to breathe and relax as often as possible.
If you can’t find a way to be at peace with the way you’re spending your time, start considering serious damage control. Life is too short to sell your time, health, happiness and your soul.
Schedule Playtime
Make playtime sacred like any other meeting in your calendar. Block time out, prevent work from creeping into it and follow through. If you do not keep a calendar, make time for fun and make sure people around you know when you plan to disappear. On the quest for work-life balance, scheduling time for life is a great first step.
Gratitude: Social Currency
It feels great to get a pat on the back. Everyone needs a little appreciation here and there. Dish it out to others as much as you can. Genuinely thank someone for making your life better. If you can’t find an honest way he or she makes your life better, identify a characteristic you admire and point it out as a good thing. It makes a huge difference and may win you a new friend. Express enough genuine gratitude, and you may find yourself surrounded in friends.
Keep At It
Even when no one notices or cares, keep fighting the good fight. When someone finally notices, he or she will come to appreciate your persistence and dedication. A series of wins makes a winner, not just one win. The longer and harder you try, the more reputable and respected you will become when you’re finally acknowledged.
Optimism By Education
It is difficult to face every situation with a smile. I’ve discovered one trick that helps make even the toughest moments in life acceptable: approach every situation – good or bad – as an opportunity to learn. It may not turn coal into cheesecake, but at least you can walk away with the most important spoil of war: a life lesson. Few people will help you navigate life this way. It’s up to you to step back from the situation, take notes and review. The more you reflect on life’s lessons, the more prepared you will be to tackle any problem. With the poise and experience to tackle any problem, you may yet find yourself less unhappy and more excited by all that life has to offer.
Life Echoes
I sit beside this exact fire once every few years with old friends – most of whom I had not seen since the fire before it. In moments like these, everyone can catch up, let go and share in timeless togetherness again. As if the last fire occurred in the not so distant past, conversations and idiosyncrasies flashback in ways that challenge the passing of time. Reunions often cathartically reorient your core and priorities. You remember who you were, remember who your friends were and remind each other. Save for a few nostalgic campfire stories, the echo of your past happens subliminally. It feels like reverberation in your memory – like a moment worth reliving. Reunions enrich the soul. Without losing yourself to total nostalgia, I recommend assembling them as often as you can.
Take the Scenic Route
On the path to branching out and exploring life, consider taking the scenic route. The most direct route seldom overlaps more sensational routes. Whether on purpose or by accident, take the road less traveled. With or without a map, the adventure can take you to new places and allow you to see things few people take the time to see. Detours open doors to new restaurants, neighborhoods, architecture, nature and people. Who knows what you might find or connect with. Just one day per week, budget an extra ten minutes for your commute and try a new path. See where it takes you. Who knows? You might fall in love.
Explore, Expose, Educate
For most of us, school held our hand through learning. Adults expected us to show up, study and graduate. I cannot speak for you, but the structure of institutional learning failed to inspire me to pursue learning beyond the walls. Some teachers made a difference and instilled within me the value of lifelong learning – but the curriculum never asked for it. For shame. I’ve worked very hard post-college to open books, study new things and apply learning on my own. Many things self-taught have made me considerably more competitive in the job market, comfortable with business and well-rounded as person. Sound good?
The single biggest piece of advice I have for anyone looking to better themselves: expose yourself to activities, culture and people you do not yet know or understand. Do things you’ve never done. Try things without a second thought. No prejudices. No fear. You really did not have a say in what you learned growing up – why be picky now? Wipe away those inhibitions and get back to your education! Mix it up, kick-start the brain. Live, learn and love life.
Craig Ormiston 