Taking Things Slow

When I was growing up, the courtship expression “taking things slow” was entirely sexual. As the world matured and knocking boots became a recreational pastime, that expression became far less definitive. You want to take things slow? Okay, fine. But we’ve already consummated our acquaintance, so what exactly are we taking slow? Exclusivity? Time investment? Attendance at family gatherings? Dark secrets? Shared finances? Contracts? Procreation?

If you want to take things slow, you need to define a pacing metric for the other party involved. It is unreasonable and unnatural to expect the other person to take it easy on all fronts. After all, you would hope he or she is invested in you and wants to share more. While love will always be abstract, communication is imperative and there are a whole host of metrics you can outline. If we’re talking sexual, the bases can be a metric. Dates, deadlines and introductions can be metrics. Be clear about what the milestones are and do your best to sincerely justify your rationale.

No, this is not a relationship advice column. “Taking things slow” applies to business, projects, negotiations, physical therapy, meal consumption, tricycle training, and world domination. Metrics, objectives and scheduling are essential for measuring progress and success.

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